The Way I Want To

This post will be kind of a rambling stream of consciousness thing…beware…

I’ve been having some interesting conversations with my niece this week. We’ve been talking about the notion of “self”, Zen, masculinity/femininity and the continuum of such ideas, and how to live one’s life. Yes, it is nice to have a niece like this, with whom you can solve the riddles of human existence.

This morning, for some reason, I was thinking of my parent’s old friends Dalton and Elsie, from Monroe, Louisiana. They were good friend when we lived there, though that wasn’t a long time. We moved to Texas when I was 5. But for many years we would visit them when we went over there. They has 3 or 4 daughters, the youngest was my age. A good family. Good people. Anyway, I did a quick search and found that Dalton and Elsie are both dead. Not a surprise. They were old. Dalton lived to be 94.

I suppose I’ve been thinking a lot about mortality the last few weeks. Don’t worry – nothing profound coming up. It all seems like yesterday and a million years ago. Looking up our old friends reinforced that feeling. When I think about all this it’s impossible not to reflect on my own life and how I’ve lived it. I’ve had a great career as a public librarian. I love it. I believe in it. I believe in public service and intellectual freedom. I’ve helped promote and continue those ideals. Furthermore, I think a proper life on Earth centers around lifting others up. Cooperation over competition. Kindness and generosity. I think anyone who thinks otherwise should be taken out and maimed (kidding…kind of).

Everyone struggles to figure out who they are and what they should be doing. We all come to different conclusions. I think it’s critical that we all be free to be who we really are and to explore and figure that out. The roadmaps to happiness we are given by society are not for everyone.

Which all why, a few years ago, after I accidentally recorded this beautiful skateboarding clip I used it to make this very short video and used “If 6 was 9” by Jimi Hendrix.

Because when I was 11 years old I became a skateboarder and beneath all the layers I am happy to be a dirty old skateboarder.

I’m the one that’s gonna have to die
When it’s time for me to die
So, let me live my life the way I want to