I’m not saying I have any special knowledge or whatever. This is just an observation. I’m as guilty as anyone.
Most people really have no idea what strength is. It’s easy to rename stubbornness, pettyness, and smallness as “strength” and continue on the path of weakness, lazyness, and self-deception. You see it all the time. People who pick the easy route and claim they are being strong. It’s easier to close your doors to people, but it’s the coward’s way forward.
I deleted the Concrete Lunch Podcast account on LibSyn. I am still doing the Freestyle Podcast, but I haven’t done a Concrete Lunch podcast in a long time, and I feel like I don’t have a lot of time for it. I have some new podcasting ideas that I might try out, but decided to let this one die off. It was fun. But it’s more fun to do a podcast along with a friend or two. Whatever I do will have something to do with skateboarding. Or hell, maybe tabletop roleplaying games. I don’t know.
A couple that didn’t get used in the new video from NeverWas skateboarding. Started thinking. Instead of Fakie 360s, how about a Fakie 270 and then do something else. So this is me fiddling around with that idea. The other is a manual.
Well, after really digging G+ for a while, Google revealed today that it is discontinuing the service. It seems they had a data breach with G+, and based on the fact that it didn’t really catch on like they wanted they’re going to kill it off.
I like G+ because I didn’t see very cockeyed bullshit idea that everyone posted like on Facebook. I could join, for instance, a Traveller RPG community and only see that stuff. It was nice to, for the most part, interact with people without finding out they are nuts.
Anyway, a lot of the RPG gaming communities from G+ are moving to https://mewe.com/. MeWe is a social network that seems to value privacy a bit more than others. Their business model is different. It’s so different that I wonder if it is really viable. I hope it is. I think I may spend some money with them just to help them out. One cool thing — you can’t see much about a person there without actually being one of their connections. I like that. Anyway, I signed up a while back, and now I’m going to give it a real shot and see how it goes.
I finally got out last night to film some last stuff for the upcoming NeverWas II video. I’ll be honest. It wasn’t easy thinking up new stuff to do. It’s not like I’ve learned a lot of new tricks since the last one. It would be nice if I had a parking block at the little ditch where I skate, but I don’t. Oh well. I just kind of skate the way I skate. I realize now that mostly I do a lot of 180s and 360s in different combinations. That’s what I like to do. So they’ll be getting a lot of that in this upcoming blockbuster. It’s actually quite fun to get these clips together and then see what another editor does with them.
Anyway, here’s a clip I did yesterday. Just me doing the same old stuff. Have no idea if it will make the final cut on the video.
I’m sitting in the same hospital room we had in November 2016. My mom fractured her hip in a fall yesterday. Looks like surgery this afternoon. She had a good night. It sure is hard to see her like this, but that’s the road we’re on. It’s going to be a rough week for her, and a rough few weeks after that, but we have all the resources we need to get the hip repaired and rehabbed as well as possible. Life sure is weird, but it’s still good. It’s good just to be in the room with her. We need to get this hip fixed, and get her back on her feet before she loses too much muscle.
I’m at Boston Logan airport, about to fly home from the pleasant summer temperatures up here to the scalding horrible 105 F at 7pm temps of home, in Dallas. I’m not really looking forward to it. I want to see my mom, and our cats, but the notion of dealing with the next month or more of bullshit high temperatures does’t thrill me. I realize that winters up here are miserable too. I get that. But it’s not winter. When it’s 105 in the shade at 7pm I don’t want to go out and skate. I don’t want to go to aikido (the dojo will be hot as hell). So I guess I’ll just lay around reading this week.
There’s a lot of summer left at the library. I have a lot to do, and I feel somewhat refreshed after a week of vacation. Spent the week on Cape Cod. Went to the beach once. That’s as much as I like. Not a big fan of the beach. I love being by the ocean. I just never feel very comfortable at the beach. I burn easily, so I’m also covered with sun screen. My lower back doesn’t enjoy sitting in a low beach chair that is half sunk in the sand. So an afternoon at the beach is OK. I don’t mind taking one for the team.
We took a ferry ride over to Martha’s Vineyard. There were lots of white people there. Lots of little shops to go in. Places to drink. Not really my thing. It was hot that day. Not Texas hot, but if it’s 80 degrees, humid, and the sun is out, it feels really hot. So honestly, we weren’t that stoked about Martha’s Vineyard. The next day when the family went to Nantucket (to the beach again), we stayed on Cape Cod and took a drive around. Went to an old Meeting Hall in Barnstable. It was actually kind of cool. I like stuff like that. It was nice to drive around with my wife, talk, laugh, and chill. Then we went home to the big house the family was renting, grilled some food, ate by the pool (in the wonderful cool shade — it was beautifu) and relaxed. The house we were renting was great. Hanging there by the pool in the late afternoon was really nice. I got some reading done.
Friday we went for a bike ride, on a great bike path on Cape Cod that was built under the Rails to Trail initiative. Great trail. Really a fun thing to do.
Well, the airport is fairly chill right now. I got a shitty C boarding pass, so I’m sure I’ll be stuck in a middle seat for the 4 hour flight. Oh well. First world problems. I’ll be home soon enough.
I feel like Google + is a much better platform for sharing and enjoying stuff online that Facebook or Google. Maybe it’s just not as popular with the fascists, morons, assholes, and goons? I don’t know. Maybe its the whole “circles” of friends you can create there? I’m sure if I looked I could find some real jerkoffs there, but it seems easier to ignore them. Sure, Google is a big intrusive company, but at least they seem to have their act together. I’ve tried https://mewe.com , and I like it, but it seems like it has too much to overcome in Facebook. I fear its days are numbered.
Now, sure, it’s important to know that people like that exist, but are we really in danger of not knowing that if we don’t read every disturbing thing they scrawl on Twitter? I don’t think we are. It’s not so much a matter of isolating myself, but more like being selective about that I allow to affect my blood pressure.
But I still have some personal agency left. Tonight I’m deleting both of my Twitter accounts, and never looking at it again. Not give the morons, scumbags, and evil fucks any more of my attention. Not letting it make me worse. My job is to get better. Always better. Always aim higher.
I went out to shoot some video clips for the upcoming NeverWas #2 video the other night. Didn’t get anything I thought was good enough to submit, but this screen capture image, manipulated to deal with the setting sun in the background, was kind of cool. Looks kind of like a Polaroid.
I posted this on the AlwaysWill messageboard, an oldschool forum I and some buddies set up as an alternative to Facebook and other social media. A couple of the guys enjoyed it. I guess it spoke to them. I tend to write this stuff publicly but it’s really more self-reflection. Helps me sort things out. The background — I’m working to film some stuff for the NeverWas-2 skate video, the upcoming sequel to Can You Spare Some Cutter Me Brother. So this mission has taken me back to all my old skate spots, which of course is where I skate all the time anyway, but looking through the lens of this project I realized how appropriate I think it is to go back to the old spots. It’s important to have places in your life worth caring about. Places are a big deal. Find the shittiest place you can find, and somewhere there’s a person for whom that place is sacred. The house I grew up in is 3 streets from this school. Anyway, all but one of our old neighbors have moved out of the neighborhood. Sometimes I wonder when I skate there if anyone drives by — someone who’s lived there for 45 years – sees me skating – and thinks “There’s that guy again.”
Well, yesterday the Richardson Community Band took over my freestyle spot for a Memorial Day Weekend concert of patriotic music. Of course, being a non-patriot, I didn’t go. Instead I went to my little ditch that I’ve been skating for the last 40 years and filmed a few tricks for the next NeverWas video. Then I went over to the school parking lot in my old neighborhood where I learned to skate and film a few more tricks and lines on a street board.
Going there is peaceful. It brings up some emotions. I remember being in that parking lot 40 years ago. I was the youngest of a little crew in the neighborhood. In the summer we’d skate there all-freaking-evening until the sun went down and then some. There was nothing there but flat, curbs around the edges, and a wheelchair ramp. We made do. We’d spin 360s on the little tiny ramp. Do freestyle tricks. Roll around.
A couple of years ago they tore up the little ramp and replaced it with a sideways facing one that is covered in those shitty textured concrete tiles they put all over the place these days for “safety”. I was bummed. The concrete there is starting to get kind of crusty in a few spots, just like I am. We are damned near the same age. I know it’s probably just a matter of time until they rip that concrete up one summer and redo it. That will be weird for me. There’s this one spot where there’s a circle of smoother concrete. That’s where I practiced 360s. It’s still there! It’s so strange to me to think that all this concrete is the same stuff I have ridden on thousands of times.
Yeah, my wife has been out of town for over a week, I’m a solitary person, and maybe I need some company. Maybe I’m delving too deep into this weird peaceful melancholy.
Anyway, it was fun to skate there. I’ll go back later today and film a little more, I think. Toni’s flight gets in about 10:45pm tonight. That gives me time to skate, come home and shower, then go out and get her.
I still need to get some better stuff for that video, but it is coming together.